“Good thing I’m an only child.”
I say that to myself a lot. Especially when I have to face some things alone.
But the truth is… often, things are better when they’re shared.
Right now, I’m exhausted and a tangle of emotions, and my heart is on my sleeve because my baby is flying the nest tomorrow. Today we made a trip to the doctor because she has strep and feels awful. Yesterday, I had to make the terrible awful decision to put my dog to sleep, and it would all be easier to handle if my husband weren’t away on business. While he might not understand exactly, just the fact that he would be there counts for something. I know he would be here if he could be. Because he needs a hug and a shoulder to cry on just as much as I do.
Hugs are all they’re cracked up to be.
So are shoulders to cry on.
Fortunately, I had a few to cry on. And some hugs to get me through yesterday and today.
But tomorrow… That’ll be hard.
My puppy will be gone and I won’t be able to use her ears as the best tissues ever. My girl will be gone and I won’t be able to hug her to console myself.
Sometimes…. life is just hard. I know God is there, as He always is, waiting for me, but I absolutely believe that He’s fine keeping His distance sometimes to allow us to grieve and feel pain and be human.
He created emotions so I think He more than understands our need to work through them.
For now, this is one of those times.
While I don’t plan on wallowing for long, because after all, my heritage is built from those who didn’t, I’m going to give myself time to just be. To sit with my thoughts and feelings. To spend time in prayer. To laugh if I can, and cry if I can’t help but cry.
I’ll be taking a break from posting until after the new year, but I did want to wish you all a Very Merry Christmas celebrating the birth of Jesus, who came to bring us hope and one day, take away our sadness and replace it with eternal joy. Also, no matter what your situation, please take the time to love the ones you love. Whether it’s your child, parent, friend, neighbor, co-worker, or even your pet, our time with them now is so fleeting, make sure they know how much they matter to you. They are the only true riches we will ever have in this earthly life.
Merriest of Christmases and Happiest of New Year’s! God Bless!